080392
Parentheses - An interruption of continuity; an interval.
"This is one of the things I wasn't prepared for — the amount of unfilled time, the long parentheses of nothing" (Margaret Atwood).
“For every period of time when you exist, short or long, there is a temporal part of you that exists only then. And for any temporal parts of any objects whatsoever, there is a larger object made up of just those parts.” - John Locke
"Every time I enunciate 'I', even in my thought, an identity is assumed, and this identity is itself not simple, but a figure of a complex gathering of personal and impersonal histories, texts, discourses, beliefs, cultural assumptions, and ideological interpellations...it is not an artifact but a process." - Richard Dyer
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
- Law attachment has been pretty fun! really blessed to have such a wonderfully crazy bunch of people. the job is also good, tho i think we'll turn out to be better journalists than lawyers. anyway the meetings we've been having were extremely fascinating... its a whole world outside, outside of just practising law - introduced to the new perspective that the law is merely an instrument to facilitate business. ultimately, its how you use the law to further your purposes/business. pretty cool. this is the real world. sadly, we only get to attend such meetings once or twice each day, so the rest of the day (9am to 6pm) is left for us to mess around and stuff.. hahah. right after Day 1 at work, we've alr planned the itinerary for the nxt few days. so far we've finished watching Transformers, Casino Royale and Pirates of the Caribbean (idk which part). we've also played nearly all of the card games ever invented - poker, texas holdem poker, bridge, solitaire, rummy (mahjong w cards), slapjack, snap, sandwich, (okay daidi and blackjack hvnt play..) - so we keep ourselves pretty entertained. facebook games are awesome time-killers. Charmaine is hooked on SororityLife, Junwei is hooked on PremierFootballLeague (and im his right wing whatever!!!), im hooked on beating junwei's Chain Rxn score, & Shakti is hooked on my phone's Guitar Rock lol. so its been smashing. food here is rly gd, hvnt been to the same place for meals YET. been to the Funan Weng and Onceuponamilkshake downstairs, the Soup Spoon at tanjongpagar xchange, Amoy Street Hawker Ctr (the food thr is soo cheap and the servings are mighty generous!! go get the pork rib noodles!!), and Subway at the Amara hotel. so its been pretty touristy too, we get to see places we normally dont go to :) last thurs evening we also got invited by Prof Lawrence Boo of The Arbitration Chambers for a little mingling in his cocktail party of bigshots.. we met a few people but the most memorable had to be Davinder Singh!!! :D :D im still reeling in from the excitement, as you can see. so this attachment has been simply awesome. couldnt hv asked for anythg else! heard that the rest got very boring stuffs to do at their firms.. so i guess im really fortunate ;]
- on to more emotional stuff. ive finally felt the hurt, this very different form of hurt - the hurt that comes from utter disappointment. it is especially so in people whom you've looked up to for leadership, people you actually really look up to, and model yourself after, who, for the first time, have disappointed you. it really stabs you straight in the heart. it makes you wonder if there is any hope left in anyone, if there is anyone left whom you could fully depend on, rely on.. and to entrust with responsibilities. it feels like a one-man show, fighting on, never seeing the end, probably like Moses who never saw the Promised Land... and then again im reminded of what faith really is & what hope is all about - "who ever hopes for what is already seen/made known?". so i'll just live on the spiritual food that is faith, and believe that one day this vision is realised. Revival and Restoration. these are merely words but do you know what they mean? they both have this invisible barrier that separates the new from the past.. how to generate this leap to the other side? when will it happen? is it ever going to happen? are we just going to be like this? its so easy to choose the easy way out - which is what almost everyone seem to have chosen - to let go of this fight, to just release yourself from all these - not so much physically but more of the mind. so i guess i willingly took this fight as my own. sometimes its hard to believe the words "My yoke is easy and my burden is light". then again, im reminded that we should always "pray as if the request was already granted, and believe that help is on the way". i need a little help here.
- you dont know how your words surface in my mind, in your voice, whenever i look at your pictures. but you're the door i will never allow myself to enter, even if it is ajar and beckoning me in. you're a liar (yes, it takes one to know another but so what). you're so another; another one of them. nice try but too bad you've blown your cover.
~
This is a song that came to my mind after i read the article on Low Hwei Yen, the lady who was killed in the Mumbai bombings, and how her husband still couldnt move on. i really feel for him, they were only just married.. who knew. :( i really pray&wish for him to stay strong, and somehow find more meaning in life eventually. idk why i have this really strong empathy for people who have lost their loved ones... when Steve Irwin passed away last yr i dreamt of his wife telling me how terribly in grief she really is, and the nxt day the papers published that she confessed she wasnt coping well with the loss. pretty amazing stuff. anyway, here are (part of) the lyrics;
If only you could see the tears in the world you left behind
If only you could heal my heart just one more time
Even when I close my eyes
There's an image of your face
And once again I come to realize
You're a loss I can't replace
- Soledad, Westlife
Labels: heal