080392
Parentheses - An interruption of continuity; an interval.
"This is one of the things I wasn't prepared for — the amount of unfilled time, the long parentheses of nothing" (Margaret Atwood).
“For every period of time when you exist, short or long, there is a temporal part of you that exists only then. And for any temporal parts of any objects whatsoever, there is a larger object made up of just those parts.” - John Locke
"Every time I enunciate 'I', even in my thought, an identity is assumed, and this identity is itself not simple, but a figure of a complex gathering of personal and impersonal histories, texts, discourses, beliefs, cultural assumptions, and ideological interpellations...it is not an artifact but a process." - Richard Dyer
Friday, March 5, 2010
perhaps the one thing that remains constant through all time is this: taking MC from school makes people feel happy, rested and sane.
of course.
on thurs, though i had really terrible sore throat and cough i went to schl to take the freakin econs test so i dont hv to bear the agony of taking it nxt week. right after that i went to see the doctor and got a 2day mc :) so here's me - contented, well-rested, satisfied, no sense of sleepyness, no headaches, no stressful feelings in my heart. i rmb the times i used to make myself take at least 1 mc per term to keep sane and just to break the routine. how was i able to do that? im a highlevel hypochondriac, in that if i want to fall sick i'll just think that i have a fever and my self-delusion actually alters my physical condition such that WOOHOO i get 37.5 deg on the thermometer! very useful gift, huh. anyway breaks from routine are very important for my sanity, im just not the go-for-miles-like-this kind of person. holiday breaks are definitely not enough.
anyway! here are a few songs i like very much! (:
Never Say Goodbye - Hayley Westernra
Lyrics:
If I could take this moment forever
Turn the pages of my mind
To another place and time
We would never say goodbye
If I could find the words I would speak them
Then I wouldn't be tongue-tied
When I looked into your eyes
We would never say goodbye
If I could stop the moon ever rising
Day would not become the night
Wouldn't feel this cold inside
And we'd never say goodbye
I wish that our dreams were frozen
Then our hearts would not be broken
When we let each other go...
If I could steal this moment forever
Paint a picture-perfect smile
So our story stayed alive
We would never say goodbye.
~
The Prayer - Andrea Bocelli & Heather Headley
Lyrics:
I pray you'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don't know.
Let this be our prayer, as we go our way.
Lead us to a place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe.
La luce che tu dai
Nel cuore restera
A ricordarci che
L'eterna stella sei.
I pray we'll find your light,
And hold it in our hearts
When stars go out each night,
Remind us where you are.
Nella mia preghiera
Quanta fede c'e.
Lead us to a place
Let this be our prayer
When shadows fill our day
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe.
Sogniamo un mondo senza piu violenza,
Un mondo di giustizia e di speranza.
Ognuno dia una mano al suo vicino,
Simbolo di pace...di fraternita.
La forza che ci dai
E desiderio te
Ognuno trovi amor
Intorno e dentro se.
Let this be our prayer,
Just like every child.
We ask that life be kind
And watch us from above.
We hope each soul will find
Another soul to love.
Let this be our prayer,
Just like every child.
Needs to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
E la fede che hai acceso in noi
Sento che ci salverai.
~
only recently when my gp tutor showed us a video of how bad the Rwandan genocide was, that i really, really knew how much atrocity humans are capable of - how states can manipulate their citizens into extremism, how very selfish and inhumane other countries can be by just watching such crimes against humanity go by, refusing to step in to stop the problem or even offer help. worse yet is all the bureaucracy red-tape which has caused so many to die in vain. i got very angry with the world that day. but i felt a bit lag cos it happened in like 1994. thus there is truth in the saying 'ignorance is bliss'. but this bliss is a fool's bliss, none of us should wish for it. instead, the more we know, the more we are able to understand and operate in this world we live in, which can only be good for ourselves.
also, recently i've been occupied with the question: where is the line between idealism and naivety? of course it ranges from issue to issue, but asking this question helps to acknowledge our limits.
my birthday's coming. is it natural to feel nothing? and there is reason to feel nothing. what am i supposed to celebrate, a grand total of 157680 hours of not letting all kinds of stress and their following suicidal thoughts kill me? 6570 days of surviving in this world? of which i spent 2800 days in school?? in the first place, any distinctions between time, let's say one second to the next, is but an illusion. who is to say when night ends and day begins? time is but our way of quantifying it so that we might place some order in our lives. some say days follow the rotation of the Earth. so i'm supposed to celebrate being rotated on the Earth 6570 times? thanks. in my opinion, there is much futility and very few meaning in celebrating birthdays. but i will still celebrate them, because its the norm, because i'm subject to the ethnomethodology of the world. besides, its a convenient excuse for me and my family/friends to splurge on all sorts of things for myself and just feel special, albeit superficially, for a day. and after that day, my physical body is expected to advance in such a way that i'll be able to jump 2cm more for Standing Broad Jump, run 10secs faster for 2.4km, do 1 more inclined pull-up and 1 more sit-up. where's the justice in that??
"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith."
- Philippians 3:7-9
of course.
on thurs, though i had really terrible sore throat and cough i went to schl to take the freakin econs test so i dont hv to bear the agony of taking it nxt week. right after that i went to see the doctor and got a 2day mc :) so here's me - contented, well-rested, satisfied, no sense of sleepyness, no headaches, no stressful feelings in my heart. i rmb the times i used to make myself take at least 1 mc per term to keep sane and just to break the routine. how was i able to do that? im a highlevel hypochondriac, in that if i want to fall sick i'll just think that i have a fever and my self-delusion actually alters my physical condition such that WOOHOO i get 37.5 deg on the thermometer! very useful gift, huh. anyway breaks from routine are very important for my sanity, im just not the go-for-miles-like-this kind of person. holiday breaks are definitely not enough.
anyway! here are a few songs i like very much! (:
Never Say Goodbye - Hayley Westernra
Lyrics:
If I could take this moment forever
Turn the pages of my mind
To another place and time
We would never say goodbye
If I could find the words I would speak them
Then I wouldn't be tongue-tied
When I looked into your eyes
We would never say goodbye
If I could stop the moon ever rising
Day would not become the night
Wouldn't feel this cold inside
And we'd never say goodbye
I wish that our dreams were frozen
Then our hearts would not be broken
When we let each other go...
If I could steal this moment forever
Paint a picture-perfect smile
So our story stayed alive
We would never say goodbye.
~
The Prayer - Andrea Bocelli & Heather Headley
Lyrics:
I pray you'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don't know.
Let this be our prayer, as we go our way.
Lead us to a place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe.
La luce che tu dai
Nel cuore restera
A ricordarci che
L'eterna stella sei.
I pray we'll find your light,
And hold it in our hearts
When stars go out each night,
Remind us where you are.
Nella mia preghiera
Quanta fede c'e.
Lead us to a place
Let this be our prayer
When shadows fill our day
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe.
Sogniamo un mondo senza piu violenza,
Un mondo di giustizia e di speranza.
Ognuno dia una mano al suo vicino,
Simbolo di pace...di fraternita.
La forza che ci dai
E desiderio te
Ognuno trovi amor
Intorno e dentro se.
Let this be our prayer,
Just like every child.
We ask that life be kind
And watch us from above.
We hope each soul will find
Another soul to love.
Let this be our prayer,
Just like every child.
Needs to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
E la fede che hai acceso in noi
Sento che ci salverai.
~
only recently when my gp tutor showed us a video of how bad the Rwandan genocide was, that i really, really knew how much atrocity humans are capable of - how states can manipulate their citizens into extremism, how very selfish and inhumane other countries can be by just watching such crimes against humanity go by, refusing to step in to stop the problem or even offer help. worse yet is all the bureaucracy red-tape which has caused so many to die in vain. i got very angry with the world that day. but i felt a bit lag cos it happened in like 1994. thus there is truth in the saying 'ignorance is bliss'. but this bliss is a fool's bliss, none of us should wish for it. instead, the more we know, the more we are able to understand and operate in this world we live in, which can only be good for ourselves.
also, recently i've been occupied with the question: where is the line between idealism and naivety? of course it ranges from issue to issue, but asking this question helps to acknowledge our limits.
my birthday's coming. is it natural to feel nothing? and there is reason to feel nothing. what am i supposed to celebrate, a grand total of 157680 hours of not letting all kinds of stress and their following suicidal thoughts kill me? 6570 days of surviving in this world? of which i spent 2800 days in school?? in the first place, any distinctions between time, let's say one second to the next, is but an illusion. who is to say when night ends and day begins? time is but our way of quantifying it so that we might place some order in our lives. some say days follow the rotation of the Earth. so i'm supposed to celebrate being rotated on the Earth 6570 times? thanks. in my opinion, there is much futility and very few meaning in celebrating birthdays. but i will still celebrate them, because its the norm, because i'm subject to the ethnomethodology of the world. besides, its a convenient excuse for me and my family/friends to splurge on all sorts of things for myself and just feel special, albeit superficially, for a day. and after that day, my physical body is expected to advance in such a way that i'll be able to jump 2cm more for Standing Broad Jump, run 10secs faster for 2.4km, do 1 more inclined pull-up and 1 more sit-up. where's the justice in that??
"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith."
- Philippians 3:7-9
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